You would have come across critical situations, which have upset you immensely!
Remember nobody repeat nobody has the power to upset you, but you yourself. Your control buttons are with you and nobody can press these, unless you allow them to do so!
Techniques to resolve tricky situations
- Do not take it personal. Everybody has an opinion and free advice is given at the drop of the hat.
- Taking such opinion personally to heart, is fraught with danger to your health. Negative comments about your appearance, bearing, health, clothes etc, need to be simply brushed away. After all, you are the best judge of your personality.
- Remember the person making such comments may be having a complex about him/herself , and may be doing so as a cover up. To react to such comments would be immature.
- Know your triggers. Every individual is aware of the things which are not palatable to him/her. May it be food, clothes, places, people etc. The best way is to avoid these before they become a source of irritation.
- It is common among some colleagues at work place, or some family member, to pass negative comments, with an intent to antagonise. The best defence is not to let them have that power over you, and not allowing them to press the trigger buttons.
- People who are acquainted, have the knowledge of your panic buttons. Thus they can upset you easily. It is important to avoid letting them have this power over you.
- Share your feelings. Sometimes people may not know that they are hurting you. They might think that they are passing a comment to affect improvement.
- To prevent this it is essential that you nip it in the bud, by telling the person that you are aware of the same. Hence it is better to be blunt at times.
- Define clear limits. It is good to set out boundaries and let people know that you can take this much and no more. They will subsequently get used to you standing up for yourself.
- You should be prepared to take action against such persons, if need be, by cutting off all contacts with them, or take other actions, to let them know that you are serious.
- You can’t control everybody, but you can control yourself. You can make it obvious that you would not tolerate rude comments or behaviour.
- They say that you can choose your friends but not your relatives. However, you don’t have to spend time with people or family members who hurt you.
Hence, if some people are constantly sharing negative emotions, it is essential to identify those and take appropriate action to deal with them. It may not be easy, but then it is required to maintain your own sanity.